Adversity. Hardship. Setbacks. Trauma.
These are facts of life. Bad things happen to even the strongest and most prepared of us. Adversity causes us to question ourselves and the world as we know it. Yet, the difference between those who overcome setbacks and those who fall off the cliff is the narrative they construct to deal with a difficult situation.
Those who thrive develop a solution- or possibility-focused narrative. This does not mean that they pretend, hide, or put on a fake veneer of positivity. It means they choose to look at setbacks as an opportunity to reevaluate, improve, and grow.
Reflect But Do Not Attempt To Make Sense of Everything
When faced with a difficult situation, most people ask, ‘why?’ ‘how?’ ‘what?’
‘Why did this happen to me?’
‘How did this even happen?’
‘What just happened?’
It is normal to ask these questions. It is your brain’s way of trying to make sense of the situation.
However, trying to piece together the puzzle of a traumatic event can be a slippery slope. When you are asking ‘why me?’ you can easily trap yourself in a victim mentality cycle and, ultimately, depression.
In adversity, you want to find someone to blame, whether that is you or someone else. But there is a better way around this.
If you really want to survive and thrive in the haze of it all, you must strongly decide that you will not allow yourself to get caught up in the “blame game.”
You also have to surrender to the fact that, at this point in time, it might be impossible for you to understand everything that is happening.When you are not entrapped in the minutiae of the situation, you give yourself space to find solutions. This is reflection.
Reflection, as opposed to overthinking, gives you an opportunity to look at a setback more objectively. This way, you can see the situation for what it is without blaming yourself or others and without feeling like a victim.
“Reflection empowers you. Overthinking disempowers you.”
You already know that life can be a wild and unexpected ride. Emotional resilience is what separates those who crumble under pressure from those who preserve their composure. Although it’s not the most attractive quality, the ability to bounce back quickly after setbacks is valuable. What separates those who are emotionally stable? In trying times, how can they maintain their cool and keep it together?
Cultivating Emotional Balance
What does that mean, exactly?
Self-awareness is essential for maintaining emotional steadiness. Don’t we all know what it’s like to be us? Actually, many individuals hide their bad feelings rather than face them, pretending they don’t exist.
What would happen if it occurred? They will experience a breakdown or response to a stimulus that will leave them thinking, What was that all about? Self-awareness may be defined as the practice of giving one’s own thoughts and emotions their due.
Understanding your emotions entails not just being aware of them but also looking into where they come from and how they could influence your outlook and actions.
Overall, it’s beneficial to concentrate on increasing your self-awareness since doing so can help you recognize and cope with emotional triggers and enable you to make rational judgments rather than reacting rashly.
Building Emotional Resilience
Is that acceptable?
Negative experiences are accepted as inevitable by those with a strong emotional foundation. In other words, it’s unheard of to walk through life unscathed. Moreover, how can you really develop and improve if you never fail or experience hardship?
If you’re never stretched, how can you expect to improve? A person with resilience understands that difficulties are fleeting and can even be seen as learning experiences. Their ability to swiftly recover is a direct result of the information they possess.
Those who believe they can make it through life without life’s experiences will be sorely disappointed when their good fortune finally runs out.
Embracing the Journey and Being Optimistic
Those who have a solid emotional foundation tend to dwell on the bright side. Indeed, unfortunate events are inevitable. It is possible to fail at a goal you set for yourself. But do you realize something? Success is possible, and good things do occur.
The only way to know for sure is to test it out. That’s why it’s important for emotionally healthy people to look on the bright side of things and not allow themselves to become sad about anything.
Did you also know that success increases with optimism and a good outlook? It’s accurate! You will succeed because your optimistic outlook drives you to take action and continually try new things.
But if you give in to your pessimistic thoughts, you could accomplish things just halfway or even quit.
Managing Your Feelings with Grace
Is it possible to see an adult tantrum?
You’re right; it may be trying at times. The problem with emotionally unstable people is that they can’t manage their feelings since they aren’t aware of them.
Inability to control these emotions can lead to frequently destructive behaviors. Those who are emotionally stable are wonderful company, since you can be assured they won’t go off the deep end. They are familiar with their feelings, which allows them to control them.
In addition, they most definitely do not throw tantrums.
Confidence is your inner fortress.
Those who are emotionally stable don’t need others to validate their value since they already know it for themselves.
They know exactly what they’re bad at and where they should improve. But they also know exactly what they’re good at. So, what’s the end result? When they hear constructive criticism, they don’t crumble.
They can handle it and even seek it out. Those who are emotionally stable have a strong sense of self-worth and don’t seek or care about the approval of others. Sometimes I need a little boost in my self-assurance, I know.
This is a beautiful human experience, so embrace this journey.
Sensitivity to Emotions and Nurturing the Soul
We have the capacity to recognize and control our feelings. Your own, certainly, but also the feelings of others around you. The ability to read and appropriately react to the emotions of others is a hallmark of emotional intelligence.
They are able to read the room and gauge whether or not to speak out. Not only that, but they always find the perfect words to use. Those who are emotionally illiterate come across as insensitive and self-centered all the time.
That’s because they can’t “read” the room in question. Emotional intelligence, as you can see, is just as valuable as the ability to make complex calculations or recite the works in your head.
Self-discipline
Those who are emotionally secure have a lack of self-discipline. They are not readily offended, defensive, or irritated, and they rarely weep for no apparent reason. Since they are deliberate before they speak, they are less likely to respond hastily in interpersonal situations.
They always stick to the same set of beliefs and never waver from their ultimate purpose. And if they say they’ll do something, you can be sure they’ll follow through. They can put off short-term pleasure in favor of a longer-term gain.
Take the case of someone who, upon learning that they suffer from insulin resistance, resolves to alter their diet. It means cutting back on carbohydrates and sugar. Today, even on a terrible day, they can say no to any number of tempting options.
Resilience-building practices. Everyone may benefit from learning effective techniques for dealing with stress and the difficulties life inevitably brings.
You can try some of these healthy coping strategies!
Mindfulness
Because of its emphasis on staying in the here and now, meditation is useful for alleviating tension and calming nerves. Mindfulness can help those who suffer from regrets about the past and excessive fears about the future. The focus is brought back to the present moment, and tranquility is achieved by the use of an anchor, such as breathwork. When it comes to relieving stress and lifting my spirits, I can attest to the efficacy of regular exercise. The feel-good endorphins we produce could have something to do with it. The nicest aspect is that it’s accessible to everyone.
Seek Community and The Nuggets Of Wisdom That Come With It
Reaching out to others in your time of need is a powerful coping mechanism. In a society that idolizes individualism, it can be difficult to open up to others about our problems.
However, trying to deal with adversity on your own can be a long, winding, and lonely road. Consider bringing in your social network to help you cope with the hardships you are struggling with.
Friends, families, loved ones, and even strangers can be a great source of comfort and wisdom. Exactly what you need to get through a rough patch.
If you are looking for new employment or business opportunities, reach out to others. You’ll be surprised at how many opportunities there are outside of your comfort zone.
If you are looking to get into better shape, seek help from both professionals and others like you who are working toward a similar goal. When you are dealing with grief, do not be afraid to reach out to a qualified individual. If you decide to take control of your life in other areas, seek the services of a life coach.
Join virtual or offline groups comprised of people who have undergone the same challenges as you and are thriving despite it all. Their stories will certainly inspire, strengthen, and help you realize that you too will overcome this.
Journaling
Did you know that keeping a journal may be a healthy outlet? Writing about emotions, ideas, and experiences is a common technique for individuals who are emotionally healthy to work through their experiences, acquire insight, and release pent-up emotions. Not only does journaling give you a place to analyze your flaws and failures, but it’s also a great way to check on when things went according to plan. Trying it out has no downside.
Engaging in hobbies
Hobbies that you enjoy, whether it be painting, cooking, baking, gardening, or playing an instrument, is another way that emotionally healthy people deal with stress and overcome hardship. Long walks with a friend and tending to my plants are two of my favorite’s.
Self-criticism
Who is it that your bitterness and other unpleasant feelings harm the most? Avoid harsh self-criticism and treat yourself with love. We all have our flaws. Having the maturity to forgive. The one who is holding on to them, rather than the recipient.
Keeping these unhappy thoughts and feelings locked up can be physically and mentally exhausting. That’s why everyone may benefit from taking a page out of the book of a person who is emotionally stable and learning to forgive and let go.
Believe me when I say that practicing forgiveness is the key to finding the serenity you’ve been seeking.
Empathy
Those who are emotionally stable tend to be very empathetic, which is likely a result of their high levels of self-awareness and emotional intelligence.
This is an admirable quality since it helps them form lasting bonds with others, and you won’t believe what happens afterwards. These are the folks that others seek out when in need of an ear to listen to, a shoulder to weep on, or just some reassuring words.
They have the ability to make people feel secure, heard, and accepted.
In Conclusion!
Adversity will change you, but it does not have to destroy you. A life without challenges is a life not lived. If life was supposed to be easy, you’d be living in Pleasantville. But life, thankfully, isn’t without challenges, and adversity is always there to be the demanding lecturer who shapes your life. When you learn from each challenge, you can develop strategies to overcome future adversity’s, be more prepared, and act instead of reacting. You are not without a plan or methods to help you through the hardships your life may throw at you.
Above all, remember that adversity isn’t something to resent or avoid at all costs. Instead, adversity is your friend, and if you make the most of each challenge, your life will blossom in ways you can’t even anticipate. While you cannot prevent unpleasant situations from happening, you can choose how to respond to these challenges. No matter how bad things look right now, only you have the power to construct a narrative that will set you on a path to healing, recovery, and success.